SUNNY SKIES . . .

It's sunny outside today, but cold and breezy. Today is my day off. No gym, no yoga, no hikes in the park, no weight-training. Today I'm just sitting.

Today is a hard day. I don't know why. Hooch and I used to talk about people we know being manic-depressive, bipolar. People with extreme mood swings -- hysterically high highs, incredibly sour lows. We spoke with the assumption that we and I are not like that, that we are normal, steady, stable. Or at least able to present ourselves thus. And so we rode the waves of other people with as much understanding as we could muster.

But I wonder sometimes where I fall on the spectrum. Because sometimes, nothing is going wrong and nothing is bad, but I just feel ... down. Sometimes, for no reason in particular, I cry and am heavy-hearted. Sometimes, I just want to be alone and think and ponder and pray and sing and sleep. It's fascinating, actually, because I can feel myself sliding down into this, from a state of totally steady bliss and cheeriness. And I can't exactly stop myself.

And then, mostly, I'm fine.

Is there a name for this? What am I suffering from? Or is it just growing pains?