NOT BIG, NOT NASTY . . .

Sometimes, things in my life move so, so, soooooo slowly. A week left until leaving for vacation seems like a month. The days before a long holiday weekend seem to be comprised of 28 hours each. Thirty minutes on the treadmill drag on like double-length law school tax code lectures.

And other times, one event hurtles towards the next at the speed of light, so fast that I can't tell when one occasion ends and the next begins. My job search started out like molasses, and has suddenly turned into deadly mercury. Okay, not deadly -- that's just me being dramatic. But I meant to convey speed. Did you get that?

This time last week, I was thinking, "Hmmm. I should really get this application packet together. But what if I get the job, and I feel compelled to accept the offer, then I have to work waaaaaaaaay downtown, dealing with all manner of statutes and people with which I am totally unfamiliar? Dang, I'll put this off one more week." Or I was thinking, "Eh, I'll send out some more resumes later this month and see what bites." Or I was thinking, "I need to go to cooking school and just forget this whole thing."

In less than seven days, I have in my possession a completed application packet, ready to be sealed and mailed (I'm taking bets now on how long I can push that task off); I have a team of headhunters seeking law firms who hunt my head (and calling me every other day to keep me abreast of their progress -- and there is progress, praise the Lord!); I have one fortuitous connection snooping about his law firm (and I can say "his" because he just made PARTNER) on my behalf; I have transcripts and writing samples floating about in places I never imagined.

I feel less fear, now that that ball's roll has begun. Things are generally out of my hands now, and I am assured that I'm a good candidate, highly desirable, personable, charming, articulate and clearly intelligent. (Or do headhunters say that to everyone?) My only concern now is (and I'm not just saying this because my pastor found my blog) making sure to go where God leads me to go. It would royally suck the big one if He wants me to go midtown and I end up downtown. (The commute would also suck, but I suppose that's secondary.) It would royally suck if He wants me to litigate, and I end up in mergers & acquisitions. It would royally suck if He wants me to prosecute, and I end up in white-collar criminal defense. It would royally suck if He wants me to work long hours, and I sucker up to 'lifestyle' firm. It would really suck if He wants me to preserve oodles of time for my friends and family, and I hit the grindstone full-steam. It would royally suck if He wants me to work with people I don't know, and I end up in a firm where I know everyone. It would royally suck if He wants me to be in the public sector no matter what, and I bow to the private sector because I need to pay a mortgage.

(Why do we say that something that is bad "sucks"? Sucks what?)

Now my brain is moving faster than it needs to, anticipating the suckage before it has even really begun ... sloooooow doooooown ...

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NO SNORING HERE . . .

I haven't slept in days. What up with dat?

Two months until my next blood test. Can you believe I can't wait?