FIRST TIME . . .

This meme, lifted from Keepin' It Real was originally designed for Asian/Pacific American parents, but I'm not a parent yet (You hear that, God? YET. I'm counting on You!), so I've adapted it and cut out the parenting-specific questions. It's interesting to me ... sometimes, it is a non-issue to me to be Korean-American, to be Asian-American. I forget that it's a big deal to some people, for good or for bad reasons. I like the reminder, though. I like who I am, and it's helpful, once in a while, to think upon why that is ...

1. I am:
100% Korean-American (50% North Korean, 50% Seoul, South Korean).

2. I first realized I was APA when:
I was dropped off after school by a kindergarten classmate's mom. At the time, we lived in an apartment building, and the button to buzz our apartment was too high for me to reach. I tried to communicate to our doorman which button I was trying to press, who I was, where I needed to go, but no matter how hard I tried, he didn't understand a single word I was saying, because even though I was born in the United States, I grew up in a completely Korean-speaking home and didn't speak English when I started school. I had no idea how to communicate what I needed to this doorman guy (and frankly, I don't recall that he made any real effort to try to understand me), and it astounded me that not everyone spoke Korean! (End of the story: my mother grew concerned when I didn't come home at the prescribed hour, so she came downstairs to actually leave the apartment and go to the school to find me. Imagine her surprise -- and my relief -- when she found me sitting on the floor of the building lobby, crying my eyes out in anger, frustration and fear.)

3. People think my name is:
Me. My last name used to be the bane of my existence -- the source of all sorts of Chink and "ching-chong" jokes. Now, it's what my closest and dearest (and those who THINK they are my closest and dearest) call me, and frankly, I prefer it to my given name. Irony, thou doth slay me again.

4. The family tradition I most want to pass on is:
Omma's cooking ... tempered frugality ... family unity no matter what ... respect for our history ... maintaining our integrity, even if we're the only ones standing up for what is right and good.

5. The family tradition I least want to pass on is:
Ahhh ... good ol' Korean passive-aggressivism.

6. The non-English word/phrase most used in my home is:
"Byul-il ub-ssuh?" (Literally: "Nothing's up?" Figuratively: "Whaassup?")

7. The best thing about being part of an APA family is:
Being enclosed by family at all times ... having a rich and interesting Korean history that is enhanced by the experience of knowing and living in American freedom ... oh, the FOOD.

8. The worst thing about being part of an APA family is:
Being enclosed by family at all times ... the difficulties in bridging the gap between generational mores, values, traditions and philosophies.

9. To me, being Asian Pacific American means:
Being proud to have two histories -- that of my lineage before me and that of our family here in the States ... having a doubly complete self to give to the world ... feeling responsible for living a full and generous life that honours not only my parents and the lives they lived to give me my life as a hyphenated American, but also honours and encourages each generation to come.